candy coated rose petals

I just saw Closer, a very intense movie. It invoked several thoughts of which I now find myself contemplating. The intensity of emotion that often results from intimacy is intimidating and scary. Falling in love is hard to do couldn’t be more wrong. I find myself numb at the idea of trying to feel such a thing and building walls to prevent it. Lately, the idea of dating scares me and I avoid it. I can’t imagine myself in a relationship that makes any sense which is probably why I seek out pointless, senseless and useless relationships that only perpetuate my fear.   [ Read more ]